A question that many people are asked with an expectation that they have an answer:
"What do you want to do with your life?"
Well, I am 32 years old this year and I still don't know. I know what I am doing and where that is taking me but I don't think that is the same thing.
I would like to DJ at Womb in Japan (http://www.womb.co.jp/) or Amnesia in Ibiza.
I would like to create the next top club anthem or write and release a tune capable of making the top 10.
I would like to cure the worlds ill and make a difference to some of our less privileged friends around the world.
The question is not "what do you want to do with your life" but "what are you capable of doing with your life" or possibly even "what boring mundane job would you like to do until you retire".
This is not to say that I am not happy in my job or that I don't appreciate the fact that I have a good job. All I am saying is that it does not bring an awful lot of excitement and,when all is said and done, my work will not have made a blind bit of difference to the progression of the human race. I mean an IT Service Management role will hardly set the world alight or cause people to stop and think.
I think I am reasonably influential and bring a lot more to enrich the lives of those around me than just IT. Maybe I am wrong. Maybe I am destined to work in IT and maybe, just maybe, I will have the opportunity to make a difference but it doesn't appear to be coming anytime soon.
The biggest problem, of course, is the fact that I am a lazy arse and will unlikely go out and search for that excitement that I so yearn.
See my last post.
Sunday, 25 April 2010
It's been a long time coming....
Firstly, I would like to apologise to my loyal "army" of "fans".
I have proven not only to myself but also to you that as much as I want to commit to something and make and effort, my attention span will simply not allow it. Take this blog, which was designed to be a bit like an online diary. I haven't updated it for 2 months which kind of implies that I have done nothing and have no thoughts or burning issues.
The truth of the matter is unfortunately more depressing than that. The truth is that I am lazy and maybe the lack of large audience makes it easier for me to decide that my blog has no worth. However, this blog was not designed to rake in massive numbers of readers. This blog was designed to be a place for me to document my own thoughts regardless of anyone else's interest.
So, there you have it, I am a lazy twat.
I have proven not only to myself but also to you that as much as I want to commit to something and make and effort, my attention span will simply not allow it. Take this blog, which was designed to be a bit like an online diary. I haven't updated it for 2 months which kind of implies that I have done nothing and have no thoughts or burning issues.
The truth of the matter is unfortunately more depressing than that. The truth is that I am lazy and maybe the lack of large audience makes it easier for me to decide that my blog has no worth. However, this blog was not designed to rake in massive numbers of readers. This blog was designed to be a place for me to document my own thoughts regardless of anyone else's interest.
So, there you have it, I am a lazy twat.
Me thinking about contributing something to life
Monday, 8 February 2010
Arch Nemesis
I think I have discovered my enemy, my equal opposite, something just as annoying as me.
That's right. As annoying as me.
Amazingly (or not) it isn't a human. Only a cold calculating machine could be as annoying.
"What is it?", I hear you ask.
Well, I'll tell you.
You spend the best part of an hour filling in an internet form only for you to click "Submit" and watch the whole lot disappear before your very eyes and be replaced with a page saying "Error 404" or some other meaningless shite.
So you think "Ha! Fuck you Internet!" and click the "back" button (thinking you are clever and can beat your nemesis) only to find you are presented with the internet's version of a double forks in the form of a page stating:
"This page has expired" which if translated into English basically means "Fuck You Beckster!"
That's right. As annoying as me.
Amazingly (or not) it isn't a human. Only a cold calculating machine could be as annoying.
"What is it?", I hear you ask.
Well, I'll tell you.
You spend the best part of an hour filling in an internet form only for you to click "Submit" and watch the whole lot disappear before your very eyes and be replaced with a page saying "Error 404" or some other meaningless shite.
So you think "Ha! Fuck you Internet!" and click the "back" button (thinking you are clever and can beat your nemesis) only to find you are presented with the internet's version of a double forks in the form of a page stating:
"This page has expired" which if translated into English basically means "Fuck You Beckster!"
Tuesday, 19 January 2010
What is happening in the world?
Today, I am going to ignore the Manchester City v Manchester United result (we lost 2-1, by the way).
Instead I am going to concentrate on two absolutely horrendous stories in the news:
1. Burglar attacker's appeal fails
The general gist is that Munir Hussain and his brother chased down a burglar and twatted him around the head with a cricket bat.
A burglar that had broken into Mr Hussain's home and tied up his family to steal their belongings. Mr Hussain and his brother escaped, gave chase to the burglar and smacked him that hard he ended up with severe brain damage and the bat was broken into 3 pieces.
Mr Hussain and his brother are now in prison for 30 months for grievous bodily harm with intent.They are currently trying to appeal the conviction.
You know what really grinds my gears? If this burglar, Walid Salem, had not entered Mr Hussain's home he would not have brain damage now. If someone breaks into your home and ties up your family you should be able to do what the fuck you like to them.
If he broke into my home and tied up my family, he would be in my basement undergoing extensive levels of torture. The police would have known nothing about the burglary because, by the time I had finished with him, there would be very little left of Mr Salem.
Cap well and truly doffed to Mr Hussain and his brother. Not just for their courageous vigilante action but also for being able to hit someone so hard with a cricket bat that it smashes into three pieces.
I salute you!
2. Man guilty of 'reckless' HIV sex
This second story is about a woman who found out she had contracted HIV when she was pregnant with twins.The father of these twins had known he had HIV for 9 years (NINE YEARS!!) but still decided to have unprotected sex with this poor woman without advising of the risks.
Not only that, he decided to do the same to 3 other women.
Luckily, the three other women escaped contracting the virus but that is more luck than judgement.
This girl who has the virus is living with a ticking time bomb.
You know what really grinds my gears? This guy will probably get a lenient sentence because of his virus.
I say lock him up for life and when the AIDS kicks in, let this mother fucker suffer. No medication, no pain relief - just agonising pain with no assistance.
You can't take back what he did but you can make this guy suffer. BIG TIME!
Peace out!
Instead I am going to concentrate on two absolutely horrendous stories in the news:
1. Burglar attacker's appeal fails
The general gist is that Munir Hussain and his brother chased down a burglar and twatted him around the head with a cricket bat.
A burglar that had broken into Mr Hussain's home and tied up his family to steal their belongings. Mr Hussain and his brother escaped, gave chase to the burglar and smacked him that hard he ended up with severe brain damage and the bat was broken into 3 pieces.
Mr Hussain and his brother are now in prison for 30 months for grievous bodily harm with intent.They are currently trying to appeal the conviction.
You know what really grinds my gears? If this burglar, Walid Salem, had not entered Mr Hussain's home he would not have brain damage now. If someone breaks into your home and ties up your family you should be able to do what the fuck you like to them.
If he broke into my home and tied up my family, he would be in my basement undergoing extensive levels of torture. The police would have known nothing about the burglary because, by the time I had finished with him, there would be very little left of Mr Salem.
Cap well and truly doffed to Mr Hussain and his brother. Not just for their courageous vigilante action but also for being able to hit someone so hard with a cricket bat that it smashes into three pieces.
I salute you!
2. Man guilty of 'reckless' HIV sex
This second story is about a woman who found out she had contracted HIV when she was pregnant with twins.The father of these twins had known he had HIV for 9 years (NINE YEARS!!) but still decided to have unprotected sex with this poor woman without advising of the risks.
Not only that, he decided to do the same to 3 other women.
Luckily, the three other women escaped contracting the virus but that is more luck than judgement.
This girl who has the virus is living with a ticking time bomb.
You know what really grinds my gears? This guy will probably get a lenient sentence because of his virus.
I say lock him up for life and when the AIDS kicks in, let this mother fucker suffer. No medication, no pain relief - just agonising pain with no assistance.
You can't take back what he did but you can make this guy suffer. BIG TIME!
Peace out!
Friday, 15 January 2010
Flash Stroke?
Perhaps winding my wife up is also the catalyst for my weird dreams. Or maybe my dreams are pointing me in the direction of undiscovered science.
Take last night for instance - after I'd wound up my wife with the ol' "Bony Bony" I shortly drifted off to sleep....
In my dream, I was teaching my brother Dean (the guy in my first blog with the head the size of Jupiter) to drive in a 4 x 4. After the lesson, we stopped off at my house where, for some reason, my wife, Mum, Steve (Mum's husband), Helena were all waiting to take our photo for what they called an "annual family photo".
You must understand that, not being the most photogenic of families (ugly), this is weird in itself.
Anyway, Dean started making excuses to not have his photo taken saying he didn't like it. After much arguing he then revealed that he was "allergic to having his photo taken" following it up with "it gives me flash stroke".
"Flash stroke?", I enquired.
"Yeah, the flash from a camera makes me lose the ability to use one half of my body... It's like a stroke but caused by a camera"
Then before I had time to argue he ran across the road and drove off in the 4 x 4 I had been using to teach him to drive.
Obviously, I am not a great teacher either as Dean proceeded to cut the first corner he came to, failed to give way at the first junction, and narrowly escaped 3 smashes.
Weird.
Take last night for instance - after I'd wound up my wife with the ol' "Bony Bony" I shortly drifted off to sleep....
In my dream, I was teaching my brother Dean (the guy in my first blog with the head the size of Jupiter) to drive in a 4 x 4. After the lesson, we stopped off at my house where, for some reason, my wife, Mum, Steve (Mum's husband), Helena were all waiting to take our photo for what they called an "annual family photo".
You must understand that, not being the most photogenic of families (ugly), this is weird in itself.
Anyway, Dean started making excuses to not have his photo taken saying he didn't like it. After much arguing he then revealed that he was "allergic to having his photo taken" following it up with "it gives me flash stroke".
"Flash stroke?", I enquired.
"Yeah, the flash from a camera makes me lose the ability to use one half of my body... It's like a stroke but caused by a camera"
Then before I had time to argue he ran across the road and drove off in the 4 x 4 I had been using to teach him to drive.
Obviously, I am not a great teacher either as Dean proceeded to cut the first corner he came to, failed to give way at the first junction, and narrowly escaped 3 smashes.
Weird.
The Merchant of Wind Up
Today I wonder if I am the World's Greatest Wind Up Merchant. I hope I am and if this is indeed a fact, where is my god-damn medal?
Last night, I made my wife storm off for a bath and stop speaking to me by simply repeating the word "Bony"
e.g.
Wife: "Sean, your ribs are jabbing in me. You are so bony."
Me: "Bony Bony!"
Wife:"Stop repeating me..."
Me: "Bony Bony!"
etc....
She is now speaking to me again. Just.
Last night, I made my wife storm off for a bath and stop speaking to me by simply repeating the word "Bony"
e.g.
Wife: "Sean, your ribs are jabbing in me. You are so bony."
Me: "Bony Bony!"
Wife:"Stop repeating me..."
Me: "Bony Bony!"
etc....
She is now speaking to me again. Just.
Wednesday, 13 January 2010
Does God Hate Us?
Well it's simple - if He does exist, He hates us for sure.
You want proof? See the following non-exhaustive list:
2. Today's earth quake disaster in Haiti
4. Having to hide your porn from your Missus so she doesn't think you are a deviant. And leaves you.
5. September 11th 2001
6. The fact that I have to buy a 3D TV to watch Avatar the way it should be presented when it comes out on Blu-Ray
8. Also, said 3D TV will probably be a piss poor-spec compared to what will come out if I wait 6 months
9. Petrol prices and the fact that I cannot fix the energy crisis and become an instant billionnaire.
10. The Plague
So, I think you will agree that there is clearly no God.
I also so think that I have made my point succinctly enough and my list, whilst not exhaustive, does cover some pretty important issues.
However, Liverpool have just been knocked out the cup so, I guess, the jury's still out on God's hatred for us (me)...
You want proof? See the following non-exhaustive list:
1. Manchester United losing to Leeds United in the FA Cup 3rd Round a few weeks ago
3. The existence of Bobby Davro (and other annoying "celebrities")
4. Having to hide your porn from your Missus so she doesn't think you are a deviant. And leaves you.
5. September 11th 2001
6. The fact that I have to buy a 3D TV to watch Avatar the way it should be presented when it comes out on Blu-Ray
7. The fact that I will buy said 3D TV and will pay 4 times what it will cost if I wait 6 more months.
9. Petrol prices and the fact that I cannot fix the energy crisis and become an instant billionnaire.
10. The Plague
I also so think that I have made my point succinctly enough and my list, whilst not exhaustive, does cover some pretty important issues.
However, Liverpool have just been knocked out the cup so, I guess, the jury's still out on God's hatred for us (me)...
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